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I once received the best news...I hadn't lost my left ear afterall

Wednesday, May 02, 2012

‘F’ number 6

Forget. This is largely up for debate. With both Man 1 and Man 2 I don’t think forgetting is entirely possible. Oddly enough we have, on both accounts, remained friends; which itself is probably a more likely choice for ‘F’ number 6. However, that is not the ‘F’ I have been presented with, so I will do my best.

Man 1 was fairly easy to ‘forget’. I was the one who broke up with him, via msn actually which was probably not my greatest or proudest moment, but being the ‘dumper’ rather than the ‘dumpee’ made life a lot easier for me on the ‘getting over it’ front, which is evident in the fact that I had been and would soon be sleeping with other people, including his best friend (ooer). We did talk for quite a while on msn and he had mentioned that people should only be together if they saw a future with each other, which had scared me slightly. In fact this had probably been one of his fateful moves, as I certainly saw no future, I only saw us having fun. We broke up on msn on one evening in January/February 2007 and the first person I spoke to about this was Man 2, about an hour later. By April of the same year Man 2 and I had progressed largely successfully throughout the ‘F’s. Therefore, in some sense, I could say I had already begun to ‘forget’.

Man 2 was a lot harder to forget about. Actually he remains very hard to forget about, as he tends to try to make a point of letting me know he is still around if I have not spoken to him for a while. I suppose it is easier for Man 2 to ‘forget’ about me as this time I was not the ‘dumper’, rather the ‘dumpee’, which makes life a lot harder. Thankfully this dumping was not done via msn (I’m a bad person), but through many evenings of tough discussion and walking and talking, in fact it was all rather similar to us getting together, including the use of the previous ‘F’s to make us feel better after such discussions! We do live in a mixed up world.

And that was the Six ‘F’s. A lot of life boiled down to six words all starting with the same letter. I am hoping to have such experiences again, and soon. Marriage and babies always end up being the topic of conversation amongst friends and I for one do not want to be left out, on the wrong side of 25, single, unloved and potentially a virgin again – it was all bad enough the first time round. However, we must move on and ‘forget’ and ‘flirt’ and ‘french’ and ‘fuck’ because there are plenty more men in the big wide world. And that is the difference. They are ‘men’ now, not just boys putting fingers in exciting places (as boys tend to do). I must look for a man. I do not have to go through the above stages with such trepidation ever again. I actually know what I’m doing (which makes a change) and with exceptionally expansive knowledge of ‘F’s 1-6 what could possibly go wrong.  



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