Still believe Me...?

I once received the best news...I hadn't lost my left ear afterall

Tuesday, May 29, 2012

well, a sunny tuesday morning. There has been lovely weather for about a week now, unfortunately like most good things in life, this will not last long, or not long enough.
I went out with Will on Saturday, certainly an interesting afternoon. He is a rather desperate soul, wants me to give in and 'go out' with him like some sort of love sick adolescent. Thankfully he is moving to Oxford fairly soon, although he does want me to go and visit...I have told him that by that time I may have a boyfriend so not to hold out hope! Cruel but fair.
I saw C on Sunday, we went to Portishead (it's the place to be). Still not convinced by this at all but I'm also seeing him on Thursday...I probably shouldn't drag something out like this for so very long - Im having some sort of internal battle with myself :s
In other male news, I went swimming with 'guy from work' yesterday - probably a bad idea but nothing in the 'sexual' sense will be happening on that front again. He wants to take me on a day trip - interesting - I have certainly not agreed to this :s he texted me a lot yesterday, also probably a bad decision, I will blame it on the sunshine, always brings out the worst in people!
There is potential for a date with D still. He too was texting me a lot last night, the trouble with him being that we are never both free at the same time. So we will see where that goes. What I like about this one is that last night we were discussing the ins and outs of novelty underwear - there are not many people you can do that with, especially people you don't actually know!

Im seeing Mark tonight for a catch up, before Dan comes back from holiday on Friday. In a sort of side comment I have enjoyed him not being here - no comments about him, no awkwardness, no having to choke out a 'hello' when I see him. But that is enough talk on that front, unfortunately he does only live down the road :(

Well I must be off to make 40 fairy cakes....the things I do for my mother!and then time for sunbathing although hopefully no more leg burning, unlike yesterday! x

Sunday, May 20, 2012

so it is sunday. I have spent the weekend working a lot and staying up too late (or at least too late for someone who works a lot)! I am currently watching 'Vera' with the parents, I do live the highlife! I have recently been working with 'man from work', which is interesting. He has been texting me this evening telling me he has done me a favour...I may not want a favour!I'm going out with C on tuesday, I saw will on Friday. Unfortunately Im not all that bothered by all this sudden male attention and I could very easily go without it. I need to find a worthwhile lover....desperate times!

oh, I also apparently have eczema on my leg, either that or mother is not great at diagnoses!

Tuesday, May 15, 2012

I forgot to tell you about my hilarious dentistry experience...I went to the dentist this morning and had to see a young man called Adam. I am fairly sure he was actually younger than me, this is not good. so he looks in my mouth for all of five seconds and tells me my brace is broken...eughph. Anyway so after he has looked in my mouth I ask him whether I have any wisdom teeth and he has to double check before he can tell me (what sort of dentist school did he go to) annnnnd he did not clean my teeth, surely this is what dentists do??? however after all this palava the whole experience only cost me 50p...apparently I was in credit to the dentist...seriously, very odd 15 minutes of my life! x

just a quick little message before I go to legs bums and tums (which according to a more magazine,  which i was reading the other day, is a bad place to go if I am on a bit of a man hunting mission...I should instead be joining kick boxing classes and other such manly pastimes). There was a hot man in the gym yesterday..must just add this in, and according to Lynne, there is also a hot man who runs the streets of Clevedon in the evenings (I am now on man watch).
Anyway, while we are on the 'man' subject, which to be honest, we are always on...I tried sexual activity take 3 with C. Not quite as weird as before, still not exactly mind blowing and a little tedious, I mean it might just be me who gets bored quickly...but break through of the moment...he gets shy, or at least that is what he said. Well, I told him to not be so ridiculous and then he told me he might 'like me a little', which I responded to with a 'that's nice'. I am seriously not after any sort of commitment! And on the subject of my lack of commitment, there is growing potential for myself to go on yet another date with someone new, whom we will call L. I think I am getting quite good at this dating thing, however it seems that I am not so good at finding someone who I actually really like, but I am at least grabbing opportunities with both hands (oh my), and putting myself out there and hopefully will be swooped up like a pair of Take That tickets on ebay, or something like that.

Monday, May 07, 2012

so we have returned from our long weekend by the hot tub, which i must say was rather pleasant! We have eaten so much food that I don't think I will need another meal until at least Friday and I have done so little moving around that going to the gym at some point this afternoon is probably a preferable idea :s We have had some interesting discussions about the ins and outs of life...boys, love, houses, porn, irons...all the usual things I suppose! I spent the weekend surrounded by a group of 'loved up' girls, which is odd as I guess I always thought I would be the loved-up one, but that is the funny way the world works.
C has text me quite a lot over the weekend, which is good in the way it makes me feel popular but, to be honest, is starting to bore me a little. He still writes silly things and asks silly questions (or what I feel to be silly). I think I have concluded from this holiday that yes I want a boyfriend but C is not the one. I have to say he is better than Will, who has actually recently taken to asking me 'will you ever actually 'go out' with me?' , which I promptly reply to with a 'no'. C on the other hand I doubt would ever ask me that which in this particular situation is probably a good thing as it means I get to do what I want to do (to some extent) but don't have to worry too much about leading him on - it's not my fault he never asks!
So yes, before I start on this ramble, I would like a boyfriend. Hopefully in the coming weeks there are a couple of opportunities to meet new 'prospects', however I won't count on this, as if I were to expect things to happen they almost certainly won't, so an open mind is called for.

I think that is all news for now. My parents are planting tomatoes....let me paint a little picture here, it is cold, it is raining and there is a large chance that we may end up with stormy stormy weather. Now, in my experience (which to be fair to them is not extensive in the world of gardening), this is probably not the best conditions for planting new things. In fact I'm still not sure if the strawberries in the their polythene tent survived the recent gales!

Well, I leave the life stories there for the moment, while I go and do something constructive and think of something more intellectually challenging/vastly more exciting to write about next time! x

Wednesday, May 02, 2012

‘F’ number 6

Forget. This is largely up for debate. With both Man 1 and Man 2 I don’t think forgetting is entirely possible. Oddly enough we have, on both accounts, remained friends; which itself is probably a more likely choice for ‘F’ number 6. However, that is not the ‘F’ I have been presented with, so I will do my best.

Man 1 was fairly easy to ‘forget’. I was the one who broke up with him, via msn actually which was probably not my greatest or proudest moment, but being the ‘dumper’ rather than the ‘dumpee’ made life a lot easier for me on the ‘getting over it’ front, which is evident in the fact that I had been and would soon be sleeping with other people, including his best friend (ooer). We did talk for quite a while on msn and he had mentioned that people should only be together if they saw a future with each other, which had scared me slightly. In fact this had probably been one of his fateful moves, as I certainly saw no future, I only saw us having fun. We broke up on msn on one evening in January/February 2007 and the first person I spoke to about this was Man 2, about an hour later. By April of the same year Man 2 and I had progressed largely successfully throughout the ‘F’s. Therefore, in some sense, I could say I had already begun to ‘forget’.

Man 2 was a lot harder to forget about. Actually he remains very hard to forget about, as he tends to try to make a point of letting me know he is still around if I have not spoken to him for a while. I suppose it is easier for Man 2 to ‘forget’ about me as this time I was not the ‘dumper’, rather the ‘dumpee’, which makes life a lot harder. Thankfully this dumping was not done via msn (I’m a bad person), but through many evenings of tough discussion and walking and talking, in fact it was all rather similar to us getting together, including the use of the previous ‘F’s to make us feel better after such discussions! We do live in a mixed up world.

And that was the Six ‘F’s. A lot of life boiled down to six words all starting with the same letter. I am hoping to have such experiences again, and soon. Marriage and babies always end up being the topic of conversation amongst friends and I for one do not want to be left out, on the wrong side of 25, single, unloved and potentially a virgin again – it was all bad enough the first time round. However, we must move on and ‘forget’ and ‘flirt’ and ‘french’ and ‘fuck’ because there are plenty more men in the big wide world. And that is the difference. They are ‘men’ now, not just boys putting fingers in exciting places (as boys tend to do). I must look for a man. I do not have to go through the above stages with such trepidation ever again. I actually know what I’m doing (which makes a change) and with exceptionally expansive knowledge of ‘F’s 1-6 what could possibly go wrong.  


well these 'dates' have grown somewhat odd. I think i have met up with (let's call him C) C about 6 times now. It is all very well and good, we actually do seem to get along, however there are issues. I might be very picky and all that but (as these things do) one thing has led to another and that 'other' thing has turned out to be an overly perculiar experience. I dont know if there are many men like this but in my experience (which admitidly is not a large one) there aren't. We get to a certain point and all is fine and dandy and then he loses interest...very weird. I had to leave rather abruptly yesterday after we got to the weird him no longer being interested in what im doing phase and he started to touch my face which frankly i found very creepy. Basically the way he was going we could have been there for hours and it was already very late at night and overall it possibly wouldnt have gotten anywhere anyway. So that is that most odd situation!

In other news I went out today with umm 'B'. Totally different kettle of fish, older for a start, quite posh, does a lot of travelling, can imagine him being quite old before his time, C on the other hand is probably easier to have a laugh with. But we went for a nice walk around the local area. He works in IT which to be honest is probably not the best thing to look for in a person if you want them to be majorly outgoing! But i won't go in to that one too much, I may never speak to him again, must watch this space!

In even more man related news, Will wanted to take me away for the weekend, unfortunately I am (as he put it) 'very popular and pretty' (ahh :s) and have other things to be doing. I am actually going to devon with the girls, in my opinion probably a better offer as who knows what sorts of things he may try with me! I might be seeing him tomorrow actually but we will see what other offers may come my way first!

Anyway, that is all the news I have for the moment, i will now add the final 'F' installment! x